We All start out after the Fall as self orbiting, self absorbed, and completely dependent on others. With the exception of Adam and Jesus, we all start out this way. Definitely not free men yet. And we had nothing at all to do with our first birth. There were only three that decided that we were going to come into the world..., God, and mom and dad. We didn't get to choose whether or not we were born, and Adam and Eve didn't get to decide whether or not they existed either. But we didn't decide we were going to be conceived, we didn't grow ourselves in the womb, we didn't pass ourselves through the birth canal, we didn't even help, if anything, we relaxed and didn't resist which is a different story.
Even a perfect earthly father or role model/mentor cannot make a boy into a man. At best, we can be taught how to act like a man, to do manly things, and to emulate another man or men etc. But this is the limit to the ability of transferring true manhood from one to another. Even if the boy wants with all his heart to become a man like his father or mentor etc, he has no power to make himself into a man on the inside. He has no ability to take self out of the equation or to be able to extricate himself from his own self orbit or to separate himself from his own self absorption, and is powerless to change his own heart from it's own deceitfulness and ability to see through his own self delusion.
No matter what age the outer man becomes or may appear by exterior or by actions, his inner man cannot truly mature himself or be matured by any created being. And no one finds their true selves outside of Jesus. No one reaches butterfly status without Jesus, and no relationship reaches butterfly status without Jesus taking them through the cocoon to take flight. And that process is always by Jesus Power by His Spirit and always on His terms not ours.
It's not like we can make deals with God and tell Him that if He will make us into men, then we will do thus and so etc., because God makes men one way and one way only, by that man submitting himself to Jesus, inviting Jesus inside, and Jesus begins to conform the inner man into His Image. Until Jesus comes inside, the inner man is either dead or subject to his own flesh with it's lusts, passions, and still making decisions to benefit self in some way with no ability to really change that or himself at the core. Can't even reach his own core. You don't have to take my word for it, but I personally believe that no created being and no circumstance can reach the inner man or inner woman except God can reach it and change it and make it alive again.
Jesus by becoming a man, introduced His God Blood into the human blood stream into the DNA Strand all the way back to Adam, and all the way forward to the New Heaven and the New Earth. So that all anyone had to do was either believe in future Jesus before the cross, or believe in already came Jesus after the cross. So prior to Jesus, there was no way to deal with the old man. The Cross was The Place Where Jesus by His Own Sacrifice of His Perfect Self becoming sin for us all, costing Him Everything even if but for a moment, was more than enough to pay the debt that could not have been paid by all of creation combined together for all of eternity. So Jesus The Second Adam was the Only One in HIStory that gave mankind the ability after the Fall to be able to do something with the old man, by Jesus coming in by permission mortifying the old man, and making the New Man inside Alive again to God and subsequently He teaches us how to trust Him more every day and in the process Jesus diminishes or "waxes off" the old man day by day and "waxes on" the New Man, being Renewed day by day from the inside out, both are happening simultaneously. This is a mystery and hard to explain in human terms. And we had nothing to do with our first birth, and we had nothing to do with our second birth either. We didn't pass ourselves through the birth canal, we didn't even help, and at best we didn't resist, we didn't frustrate the Grace of God. We in our second birth, we did actually decide to agree with God and accept Jesus Offer, but make not mistake, Jesus did all the work, and He even provided the faith to be able to trust Him enough to take His Hand by letting Him in, and He gave you ears to hear Him, and He gave you the awareness or need for Him, and He drew you by His Spirit so that you would want to open the door to Jesus, and He set up the circumstances by which you would get to that point, but yes, you had the freedom (a freedom by Him also) to be able to choose Him over your self delusion. So He is both The Author and The Finisher of your faith and mine.
This is true for both men and women.
And Self Delusion is a powerful thing. And if that weren't so, then we could all see clearly regardless of our choices, and without God's help, and whenever we wanted to. But then we'd be God and yet we are not. So we need Him, and if you think you don't, you are mistaken and taken in by another, or by your own "self desire". Self has no ability to inform self of any good thing. Please please get this.
Let's be honest with ourselves..., Even if you were a perfect man (if that were even possible), and even if you had a perfect wife with perfect kids, and you were a perfect husband and a perfect father, with a perfect job or business and lots of money, and you did everything right with all of it, even to the extent that you gained the whole world..., could you save your own soul? Let's even consider Adam and Eve, it's not clear whether or not they would have had to choose Jesus before having access to The Tree of Life (Who IS Jesus), so even though they were perfect in form, and in a perfect world, and even though they had absolute authority over that perfect world, and even though they walked with God for part of each day..., that doesn't exactly translate into eternity with God Himself Forever? So what good is life in a perfect world with perfect everything without The One Who Made Us All?
I think we're missing something if we're thinking that perfect life without Jesus is somehow desirable. That's a really really bad false illusion that never ever served anyone well. I don't think God made us so that He would watch us grow up perfectly somewhere without Him. I think with Adam and Eve, they had yet to choose "forever with Him"..., but even though they messed that up, Jesus still came to rectify their misguided decision, and give them and all of us another shot at it All (and Him too). He Doubled Down for us All. But anyway..., Could having the whole world save your own soul? The answer is an affirmative No. You could not, and it could not. In Fact it would appear that the only place where your soul and mine can be truly "Saved" or "Safe" is With Jesus Forever because ONLY God HAS LIFE IN HIMSELF, so forever WITH HIM would be the obvious ONLY Place Where that could be the case..., IN HIM Forever. Let's explore this further...,
Even if the Devil himself could have a change of heart (even if that were possible) (for reasons that God only knows, Jesus didn't die and rise again for fallen angels, there was some kind of a done deal for them before we came along), and so even if the Devil tried to set everyone free from his influence and power, he still wouldn't be able to undue what he has accomplished or who he deceived, or undue the repercussions of what he has done. And he certainly can't undo the choices that everyone has made up to this point, and certainly he wouldn't be able to choose for others their rejection of or acceptance of Jesus. So anyway, The Only One Able to Save is Jesus and He IS The Only Door to All True Beliefs and All True Believers and He knows the difference and He IS The Way, He's not a path to follow, but He IS The Path in other words in Him IS Him, He's The Door to The Only Sheepfold that matters, the only sheepfold that will be with Him Forever. So what good is the perfect man with the perfect family and the perfect job if for eternity he will be in a place where Jesus is not and where that man will never see those of his family or anyone else that he cares about ever again after leaving this earth if his soul is lost forever? That wouldn't make sense to choose forever without Jesus...,
So that means a "self made man" is just another way of saying not a man at all, and that’s not at all a good place to be unless and until that man lets Jesus in to make him a New Man that he could not have ever made himself into on his own or in his own strength. I'm not suggesting that he not have been born, just that Jesus made that man, and Jesus paid that mans debt, and Jesus bought that mans life again, and Jesus knocked and drew that man but that man didn't want to answer and he didn't want to want to answer unless or until the day when Jesus helps that man realize his self delusion and receives Jesus so that that man can find out Who Really Made that man and Jesus would then be inside that man Re-making him again, and that man would be a real man then and only then. And so the hard lesson is that a man can have kids, but he can't decide for them whether or not they want to be with Jesus or not, or whether or not they will let Jesus in. You can kind of transfer behaviors, habits, or traditions, even religion, but not Jesus. So it's not like we're passing Jesus around like a starter culture of friendship bread...,
Please let me rephrase that..., Jesus IS The "Pre" to the Starter Culture of friendship bread, but you have to start with that, add your thing to Him, not Him as an overlay to your thing, you have to let Jesus Inside by letting Him in, or asking Him to come in..., so effectively EATING THE BREAD of LIFE, and then you pass on some of the pre-baked starter, (not sure what that part has to do with friendship bread, but that's how the Bread of Life works), so everyone who is Born Again, has inside them Jesus The Firstborn of many..., And that is not diluted, but Jesus in Full is Available to All, just like He was to all who believed Him prior to His Crucifixion, and to all of us who believe after His Crucifixion, we all believe in the Same Jesus and The Same Cross that He bore for All of us. FACT.
So what's the problem??? There are so many times that you have tasted of or partaken of that which you Knew, you really Knew..., wouldn't be good for you or good for those you did it with or against. But you Know..., you really do Know that Jesus IS Good, and you might not know yet, but He IS God, He Really IS, so do like the rest of us..., Taste (and then you'll see) and See that The Lord He is Good. You won't be disappointed.
Many go to hear about Him, many go to read about Him, many even pray to Him, but very few taste and see that the Lord is good. Many have tasted of religion and not been satisfied, but no one tastes, truly tastes Jesus (letting Him in) without being made more satisfied for the first time in their lives, and for the first time will begin to be satisfied in the inner man or inner woman. That's what's been crying out for real Nourishment. Let Jesus in and He will sort out the inside for you, in ways that you never could before, but now anything is Possible because Jesus is on the Case. And He not only solves the case, but He can give back the Lost years that the locusts have devoured, and He can give you back your life too and your future Life.